The 22 Best Places to (Discreetly) Buy Sex Toys Online in 2023

Sex toys are the most exciting appliance you will ever shop for. Their sales popped off big time during the pandemic, and the demand for them is expected to grow at an eight percent rate for the next seven years. But why are so many adult toys getting snapped up lately? The multi-billion-dollar industry’s success is undoubtedly linked to the increasing popularity of online retailers, since it’s so much more discreet to “add to cart” at an online sex shop. "You can get into all the nitty gritty details of what you're looking for without anyone watching your shop," explains certified sex therapist Indigo Stray Conger. Whether you're looking for little bullets, a new vibrator, penis rings, rabbit vibrators or quiet toys that are especially good for travel, here's where to buy sex toys online. (Bonus—if you need something stat, there are fast shipping options from retailers like Amazon, who deliver in as little as one to two business days.)

• Dr. Kate Balestrieri is a Licensed Psychologist, Certified Sex Therapist, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, PACT Therapist and Founder of Modern Intimacy, a group therapy practice in Los Angeles, Miami, NYC, Denver, Minneapolis and Chicago. She is the host of the Get Naked with Dr. Kate podcast. Subscribe to her newsletter at modernintimacy.com, or follow her on TikTok and Instagram @drkatebalestrieri.
• Indigo Stray Conger is a licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist with Mile High Psychotherapy and ThatSexQuiz.com.
• Nikki Balles is corporate director of PR and communications at Spencer's.

To vet our choices, we interviewed sex therapists and company reps and studied the biggest sellers in the market. Then we pored over reviews from users, watched Youtube reviewers go over the finer points of their favorite toys and drew on our own experience of sampling scores of toys. We were looking for many attributes, from a wide variety of products made with quality materials to gender-inclusivity. Ease of navigating sites came into play, since we're sensitive to how overwhelming an encyclopedic array of choices can be. And we called out, for better and worse, companies that maintained a strong educational component on their sites—beyond just instructions on how to use the gizmos, we looked for holistic explorations of sexual wellness through a lens of acceptance, curiosity and when appropriate, humor. Lastly, on toys that were sold on sites that gave them star ratings, we sought out toys with a majority of four-star or higher ratings—shout out to Lovehoney and Lelo for being real crowd pleasers.

With that, we’ve gathered the 22 most user-friendly places to buy sex toys online—and pulled out a few faves up top. Happy shopping!

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"You don’t have to get products that other people like, just because someone else doing it," says Balestrieri. "Pleasure is about play, talk about what is interesting to you with people you trust—don’t forget and be open to what other people suggest."

"Some newbies want to jump right in and want to experience all the bells and whistles, and some newbies want to start more gradually, like one part of the body stimulated, a cock ring or a static butt plug or a clitoral stimulator.

"Start small in terms of sensation, size and technical abilities," she says. "It’s easier to start small versus something more complex and overwhelming."

While different retailers separate their offerings into numerous categories, a general rule of thumb, according to Conger, is the following:

• Dildos: Come in many phallic shapes and sizes and can be used with or without a harness for vaginal or anal penetration.
• Vibrators: These can come in the form of personal massagers/magic wands, classic dildo shaped vibrators, g-spot vibrators, egg-shaped vibrators or rabbits.
• Anal toys: Examples include butt plugs and anal beads, used for anal pleasure. Remember that anything used for anal play needs to have a wide base for safety purposes.
• Sleeves/Fleshlights: male masturbation toys featuring an artificial textured vagina or artificial textured anus with powerful suction, primarily used for solo pleasure
• C-Rings: with or without vibration, these can assist in male stamina as well as pleasure during sex for both partners.
• Impact Play Implements: floggers, paddles
• Sex Swings/Harnesses: these are devices that lift one partner while another partner can move around the person in the swing or harness
• Restraints: handcuffs, arm and leg ties, blindfolds and other devices that are used in bondage play

"For sex toys that are either mechanical or non-mechanical and used for direct genital stimulation, medical grade silicone is typically the best material to use," says Conger. "Most users prefer their sex toys to have a little softness and give, like flesh, which makes silicone optimal. If you prefer something very hard you can use glass toys. Never use plastics or metal, as these can be toxic and dangerous for use. Never use silicone-based lubes with your silicone toys, as it will break down the material." Stop using a toy if it's breaking down: "The silicone could shed and possibly break off and cause irritation," says Balestrieri.

The cost of sex toys varies greatly, depending on what you are looking for. "Expect to spend a bare minimum of $60 for a high quality item," Conger says."You should be able to purchase just about anything for under $300, unless you are looking for designer toys that can go for much higher prices based on material and designer." But don't let price be a barrier to experimentation, cautions Balestrieri. "There’s so much diversity, some brands are more economically accessible or others may not be as elaborate designs," she says, "but they might do the trick nicely for people who might know what they like."

“When a guest shops online, they can browse the entire selection of a store from their phone or laptop whenever they want, while taking the time to check out reviews,” Balles says. And for newbies wondering where to buy sex toys, shopping online affords them the opportunity to explore bestselling products and their potential uses in a leisurely manner (from the comforts of your home, so no one can see you blush).

According to Healthline, you should be cleaning your toys after each use. Their handy chart details how to clean and store toys based on their porosity. Whether they are porous or non-porous, all toys can be cleaned with soap and water or a cleaner and then air dried. The article additionally notes that for non-vibrating silicone toys, you can take it a step further and boil the items in water for three minutes to complete the sanitization process. However, note that you should spot clean things like leather harnesses and BDSM equipment.