It’s true: Meghan Markle has been everywhere lately. Between her Netflix show, With Love, Meghan, her brand-new podcast, Confessions of a Female Founder, her As Ever product launch and more, it’s been a challenge to keep up—and this is coming from someone who counts herself royally obsessed (me!). But in recent weeks, there have been two occasions where the microphone was turned back on the duchess (the first at the Time100 Summit in New York City, the second on her friend Jamie Kern Lima’s podcast, The Jamie Kern Lima Show) and a couple of coordinating insights about the pressure on women—moms, especially—made my ears perk up.
I’m a Mom and a Royal Expert—Meghan Markle Just Taught Me to Quit the ‘Prove It’ Game
A genius insight, per the duchess of sussex
Published May 2, 2025
•7:20pm
Rachel Bowie/Jemal Countess/Getty Images
Jemal Countess/Getty Images
Let’s look at the Time100 Summit first: While there, Meghan spoke on stage with Time CEO Jessica Sibley about the work she’s had to put in to boundary-setting. In her case, she was referencing her relationship with the internet—citing a quote by Tina Fey, she said, “If you ever start to feel good about yourself, they have this thing called the internet and you can find a lot of people there who don’t like you.” (It goes without saying that Meghan has been on the receiving end of non-stop negativity and trolling online.)
Her solution? Quite simply, she stays off it—relying on others to clue her in to any must-reads, a habit that has its pros and cons. The biggest con, as described by the duchess, is that she can trend a bit behind when it comes to pop culture. As Meghan put it, she’s often “late on the boat.” (More on this in a minute, but enter my own self-inflicted parental pressure to keep up—to reply to every mom-related group text, to volunteer for the PTA, to help my kids stay current with what their peers are talking about. It’s a lot.)
Perfect segue into Meghan’s 90-minute (and make-up-free) chat this week with her friend and IT Cosmetics founder, Jamie Kern Lima, during which the pair discuss a number of topics, but most poignantly the lack of worthiness women tend to feel, which they counter with the “prove it game.”
As Meghan describes it, women especially spend so much of their lives trying to prove their worth. “You have to prove that you’re pretty enough, you have to prove that you’re smart enough, you have to prove that you’re a good wife or a good friend. I am just so done with the prove it game,” she says. (Just recently with Meghan’s multitude of launches, speculation ranged from what the heck was causing so many delays to—cue her insight about being “late” on things—why her content felt more like a perfection-driven time capsule that harkens back to the vibe of the internet before she became a royal. Criticism abounds.)
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This triggered my own personal reflections. As a working mom, I’m forever trying to prove that I can wear all the hats. That I can work all day and make the after-school play date, plus snacks. That I can plan a weekend full of family activities and look picture perfect for it. “Instagram or it didn’t happen,” is a sentiment that lives rent-free in my brain as I take on busy days bopping between work and motherhood and life while guilt tripping myself about the photos not posted, the experiences not shared. In other words, the pressure to prove my worth—my life—to others. (Yes, social media, which Meghan only recently rejoined, is a huge culprit here.)
But Meghan’s insights got me thinking: What if I could—like her—re-train my brain to quite simply drown all that noise out? Let myself be late to not just pop culture trends, but a text or an Instagram post, too, and to stop trying to prove why I embarked on something major like a career pivot or family expansion? (As a woman who just become a second-time mom in her 40s, I find myself on occasion over-explaining my children’s age gap, which I need to stop.) My new goal, inspired by Meghan: To narrate my life for myself vs. others. Cue the sigh of relief.
Because, according to the duchess, if you can achieve this perspective shift, there’s freedom on the other side and the chance to unlock something much more impactful and happy-making: Feeling content. FWIW, another insight Meghan shared on the Time100 stage is that the era she currently finds herself is the “happiest she’s ever been.” No proof necessary.
