This Boomer Trait Used to Bother Me, but Now I Want to Embrace It

The wait was long. The steaks were cold and overcooked. And the server treated us like an afterthought. Do I say something? Nah. Maybe he’s having an off night. Or the kitchen is under-staffed and three burners aren’t firing. For whatever reason—maybe it’s the millennial in me—I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve raised an issue, and one time includes a beer that tasted like poop. 

My mom, though? She says something. And I’ve noticed this with boomers outside of restaurants too. They’ll spend 45 minutes on hold with Kayak after a canceled flight and somehow walk away with both a refund and a travel credit. I didn’t even know that was possible. Me? I close the tab. I assume if the customer service bot says “we’ll get back to you in 5–7 business days,” it means never. 

Boomers expect customer service to be part of the deal. Millennials expect to be ghosted. We’ve been trained by glitchy bots, vague FAQ pages, and endless “your request has been received” auto-replies to expect… nothing. If the live chat feature on a DTC website loops me back to a virtual assistant for the third time, I’ll just close the tab and accept that the tote bag I paid for may never arrive. 

Millennials are masters of the digital shoulder shrug—not just because we’ve been burned, but because we’re also more attuned to the quiet misery of being underpaid and overstretched in the workplace. We empathize with the apathy on the other side.

Boomers expect more. And though there was a time in my life where I couldn’t believe my mom was complaining to the front desk about a stray pube in our hotel bathroom, I think I’m beginning to see the light. These are the same people who will call down to reception to say their room is too close to the elevator. They came of age in a world where flight attendants were nice. Sure, it was extremely sexist and you couldn’t keep your job after turning 28, but the customer service was part of the deal. You bought something, and if it wasn’t right, you called someone—and they fixed it. Millennials are used to self-checkout machines and cranky flight attendants, both of which accuse you of stealing pretzels. Over time, you stop expecting help and start adapting to disappointment.

But lately, I’m seeing these as-promised expectations a much more optimistic way to view the world. Why shouldn’t you get what you paid for? Maybe it’s age. Maybe it’s the slow erosion of my people-pleasing instincts. Or maybe it’s the fact that I’m now staring down the barrel of a $25 Cobb salad, but being an apathetic millennial with no standards might make my one-on-one interaction with a lululemon salesperson less cringe, but it doesn’t do anything. 

Being chill has its limits. Do we really want to raise Gen Alpha to be a “No worries!” cult of personality? So go ahead and teach the children! Ask for what you ordered. Send the email. Flag down the concierge (kindly). Stand in your truth when you tell her about the pube in the bathroom. Be the boomer you wish to see in the world.