I'm a Menopausal ADHD Woman in My 50s—Here’s What I’m Doing to Get Out of the Fog

“Dehydration can have serious consequences on the body. It can make us more susceptible to illness by leaving us feeling fatigued and lethargic due to low energy levels. It can also affect our cognitive function, leading to slower reaction times and difficulty concentrating,” according to nutritional therapist Alison Bladh. While she recommends the eight glasses of water a day which we have all heard forever, Bladh points out that a menopausal woman needs to make sure her electrolytes—those are minerals such as sodium, potassium, chloride, and magnesium—are not depleted by her fluctuating hormones. She recommends—and I daily take—electrolyte powder in one of my water bottle fill-ups.

My stress load peaks midday, and along with that, my mental sharpness plummets. At my very worst, I’m worried about everything and accomplishing nothing, and I’ll feel mentally fatigued. Rather than fight through it, I’ve come up with a way to re-set: I take a 45-minute nap. Two to three days a week, I’ll eat lunch while working then spend my midday break getting shut-eye, from which I wake re-energized. I’ve also found good results with simple zen meditation or non-sleep deep rest, as long as it’s conducted in a quiet room, ideally one that’s darkened and separated from my workspace

Since I have my phone in my hands all the time anyway, except when I’m out in nature, I have no excuse not to use it to strengthen my brain rather than simply for entertainment. I’ll play EndeavorOTC, an app-based game that uses FDA-approved technology to train your brain to pay full attention for longer and longer stints (it works by making players navigate and target simultaneously).

While a glass of wine might be a tried-and-true method of easing into evening chill mode, it’s not an option for me since as I age I’ve become susceptible to waking up groggy after ingesting depressants. (Doctor-prescribed sleep meds and cannabis are likewise not optimal for my metabolism.) Melatonin, too, leaves me feeling punchy. Instead, I’ll relax with a magnesium-based beverage that not only helps me relax, it doesn’t trigger a 2 a.m. wakefulness or 7 a.m. sluggishness.

Dr. Mary Claire Haver, author of The New Menopause, reports that the ebb of estrogen in perimenopause and menopause can lead to brain fog. “However, changes stabilized post-menopause suggesting the brain can compensate and adapt which is good news,” she writes. But for the years which can be a decade or longer when your hormones are fluctuating, she recommends hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I take a small dosage, highly individualized regimen of hormones prescribed by my gynecologist, and it’s been a boon to my default mental state being more “poised and interested” rather than “spaced out and detached.”

If you’re reading this, chances are you’re not getting enough sleep, especially if you’re in your 50s like me, since studies report that 25 percent of perimenopausal women and 30 percent of postmenopausal women reported getting a good night’s sleep only a few nights per month or less. That’s why menopause specialists like Dr. Haver stress sleep hygiene; for me, that means getting to bed at the same time every night and making eight hours of sleep my goal. I’ve been able to achieve this thanks to wearable health tech such as the Oura Ring, which lets me know via an alert on my phone that sleep time is rolling around (so, time to put down the phone).

The Journal of Midlife Health suggests 150 minutes of hard exercise per week, which doesn’t mean a pleasant walk with Starbucks, but a protracted session where, frankly, I’m expending an uncomfortable amount of effort. That might mean suicide drills on the sand at a beach near my home, or a walk-run around the Hollywood reservoir, or a hot yoga class. (I manage two to three days per week, but know I’d feel better if I did a couple extra sessions.) While I can’t emphasize enough how much I’d prefer not to be exerting myself, the mental clarity I get from the effort as well as an endorphin-driven high and burn-off of stress is beyond worth the effort. Now if I could only remember to put on my leg weights to make it even harder.

According to the Attention Deficiency Disorder Association, a diet that’s protein-rich and low in simple carbohydrates is recommended for adult ADHD sufferers. It’s key to my having a productive day, since I’ll be chasing a sugar high all day if I start with an overly sweet breakfast, whereas if I have a light breakfast and lean protein with greens for lunch, my mind feels sharper.

Okay, truth time: I am so lazy about taking B12 supplements that I prefer getting a one-and-done shot at a local med spa then enjoying the slight lift of well-being afterward. Luckily, I remember to take Vitamin D, since the deficiency of this nutrient during menopause leads to the body producing less testosterone, as hormone that’s crucial to inspiring that energetic feeling we need to think clearly and complete tasks. I prefer a splash of liquid Vitamin D in orange juice or a smoothie to a capsule.