For more than five years, I played tennis with a group of Brooklyn-based, intergenerational women—all moms. We showed up for the cardio, but the running joke was that tennis was secondary to conversation. The real draw? The 30-minute walks to and from the court—rare, unstructured time to talk honestly about motherhood, from babysitter logistics to fertility struggles.
No question was too small or wide-ranging, and we approached every challenge with love, honesty and openness. But what ultimately made it such a safe place was that we didn’t rush with answers or solutions. Instead, we listened, making space for the question and the vulnerability behind it.
That dynamic wasn’t accidental—it’s supported by research. When we lead with questions instead of advice, we invite discussion and nuance, and we build connection, not judgment. In other words, inquisitiveness creates something advice can’t: a sense of shared experience and ownership. As we approach Mother’s Day, we at PureWow are inviting our readers (and ourselves) to ask more questions of the moms in our lives—from “What do you love most about parenthood?” to “How can I help when things are hard?”. This year, let’s stop with the unsolicited advice and let’s start from a place of curiosity and dialogue. Hey, it just might make us better moms ourselves.
