Kids have big feelings and sometimes they express them in pretty big and disruptive ways. How can we help when our child is grappling with something but doesn’t have the words to describe the problem? The solution might be as simple as a new communication tool: the feelings chart. We tapped a psychotherapist and a neuropsychologist to find out how these clever charts can help you kids identify and manage their emotions (even the really scary ones).
How a Feelings Chart for Kids Can Help Your Child
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Updated Nov 26, 2025
Kaitlyn Collins
Meet the Experts
- Dr. Annette Nunez, PhD, LMFT is a licensed family therapist in Colorado with over 28 years of experience in psychotherapy. Her compassionate approach to care combines cognitive-behavioral, solution-focused, and mindfulness therapies to address anxiety and other mental health issues, whilst improving skills such as self-love and self-care.
- Dr. Sanam Hafeez is the founder of Comprehend the Mind in New York City. Dr. Hafeez received her doctorate from Hofstra University and completed her post-doctoral work in neurodevelopmental psychology at Coney Island Hospital in Brooklyn, NY. Dr. Hafeez is a New York State licensed psychologist and a New York State certified school psychologist and is an expert in trauma, learning problems, ADHD and autism.
What Is a Feelings Chart?
A feelings chart is simply a chart or wheel that labels different feelings or emotions. There are multiple different variations of this chart, depending on who the intended audience is. For example, the Feelings Wheel created by Dr. Gloria Willcox, has a few basic emotions (like happy and mad) which then expand to other forms of the emotion (say, excited or frustrated) and so on, giving you more than 40 different feelings to choose from. Alternatively, you can have a more simplistic feelings chart geared towards younger children that just labels a few basic emotions. (You can find printable examples of both these charts below.)
How Do Feelings Charts Help Kids?
“Feelings charts are wonderful because as adults we know the difference between complex emotions,” explains Dr. Nunez. (In other words, you know that when you’ve been on hold with your insurance provider for 45 minutes that you’re feeling frustrated and annoyed). “Kids, on the other hand, can’t understand those more complex emotions.” And being able to identify emotions is super important—like a major life skill, important. That’s because kids who learn how to identify and express their feelings appropriately are more likely to be empathetic towards others, develop fewer behavioral problems and have a positive self-image and good mental health. On the flip side, the frustration that comes with the inability to communicate emotions can lead out outbursts and meltdowns, the expert tells me.
“All age groups can benefit from a feelings chart,” says Dr. Nunez, adding that they can be helpful for preschoolers all the way up to high schoolers. That said, Dr. Nunez advises against using the feelings chart with 40 emotions for a younger child because developmentally, they won’t understand that. Still, an age-appropriate feelings chart is a beneficial tool to have on hand—namely because they are especially effective at helping kids manage anxiety, which research shows is running rampant among today’s youth. Indeed, a 2010 review of 19 different research studies with child participants ranging from 2 to 18 years old found that the better children were at identifying and labelling different emotions, the fewer anxiety symptoms they exhibited.
Bottom line: Learning how to identify and express feelings in a positive way helps kids to develop the skills they need to manage them effectively.
Expert Approved (and Printable!) Feelings Charts
Kaitlyn Collins
Kaitlyn Collins
And How Might Feelings Charts Help Parents?
Parenting is tough…and sometimes, well, frustrating. Needless to say, misunderstandings can make things more difficult—and feelings charts help avoid this. “Oftentimes adults will mislabel a feeling for a child,” says Dr. Nunez. You might say, ‘Oh my child feels really anxious,’ for example. But then when you ask the child, ‘What does anxious mean?’ you’ll find out that they don’t have a clue (and maybe you were way off base)! “A feeling or emotions chart is a simple visual that helps the child understand that frustration is a form of anger. And so when introducing an emotions chart to a child, it’s really important to identify [the main emotion] and then you can move on to the more complex emotions such as anxiety, frustration, proud, excited, etc.” By engaging in this process with a child, parents will find it easier to support them in developing effective coping mechanisms. And when there’s less confusion surrounding a child’s feelings, communication is more effective, and conflict is reduced.
3 Tips for How to Use a Feelings Chart at Home
- Place the chart somewhere accessible. This can be on the fridge, for example, or in your child’s bedroom. The idea is that it’s somewhere your child can easily see and access it.
- Don’t try to bring out the chart when your child is in the middle of a temper tantrum. If your kid is having a meltdown or is feeling an extreme emotion, it will be too overwhelming to bring out the feelings chart and they won’t be able to process it. Instead, in this moment parents should help kids identify the emotion (“I can see that you’re feeling really mad right now”) and then leave them be, says Dr. Nunez. Then when they’re in a better place, that’s when you can bring the chart out and help them understand what they were feeling. You can sit down with them, for example, and point to the different faces (“Wow, earlier you were really upset. Do you think you felt more like this face or this face?”).
- Don’t forget about the positive emotions. “Oftentimes, we only want to focus on the negative emotions, like when the child is sad or angry, but it’s also important to have the child recognize when they’re happy, as well,” says Dr. Nunez. So, the next time your kid is feeling happy, try asking them, ‘Oh, how do you feel?’ and having them show you on the chart. Per Dr. Nunez, you should focus on positive feelings (like happy, surprised and excited) just as much as you focus on the negative emotions (like sadness and anger). In other words, give equal attention to both positive and negative feelings.
Beyond Happy and Sad: Emotion Words to Teach Your Child
I asked Dr. Hafeez what parents can do to encourage their children to take a deeper dive into the feelings space. She acknowledged that in many instances ‘happy’ and ‘sad’ are too simplistic to get to the heart of the matter. Instead, she suggests that parents explore the following emotions with their children to enrich their social-emotional vocabulary and help them hone critical self-awareness skills.
- Confused
Kids often act out when they’re confused, not angry. “They can sense something isn’t right but don’t have the words yet. When they learn to say they feel confused, it helps them slow down instead of explode,” says Dr. Hafeez.
- Frustrated
Frustration means something matters enough to care about. It’s that feeling when effort doesn’t match results. Per the expert, “helping kids name it turns anger into a moment to pause and problem-solve.”
- Lonely
Dr. Hafeez tells me that loneliness is one of the most common feelings kids hide. It doesn’t always mean they’re alone, sometimes it’s feeling unseen, but “naming it helps them reach out instead of retreat.”
- Guilty
Guilt rears its ugly head when kids realize they hurt someone or broke a rule. Although feeling guilty is unpleasant, it’s not necessarily a bad thing; instead it’s how kids start to understand other people’s feelings.
- Worried
Worry is that loop in their head that won’t turn off. Once they start talking about what’s making them anxious, it usually feels smaller. (Note: as previously mentioned, ‘anxious’ is a feeling that younger kids find hard to define, but the concept of worry is far more relatable.)
- Excited
Excitement is big energy. “If kids don’t know what to do with it, it can spill over,” says Dr. Hafeez, adding that “helping them notice that rush teaches them how to manage it.”
- Annoyed
Annoyance is that low simmer, not full anger, just that “ugh” feeling. It’s worth naming because it shows up a lot in daily life. (And from my experience, it can escalate easily when it goes unchecked.)
- Left out
Feeling left out stings. It’s about wanting to belong, to be noticed. Every kid understands this one deep down. When a child can name this feeling, it’s an excellent opportunity to find empowering solutions that get them back in the action.
- Embarrassed
Kids get embarrassed when they think everyone saw them mess up. Their faces might turn red, or they might laugh to cover it up. A lot of the time, they just want to hide. The expert recommends having a gentle conversation with your child that allows them to open up and name their embarrassment, and then show them you can relate. It helps when an adult lets them know it happens to everyone.
- Curious
Curious is when something grabs their attention and they can’t stop thinking about it, and being able to identify it is a good opportunity to focus on the positive side of feelings. “Kids ask ‘why’ a lot because they really want to understand how things work. It’s how they explore and test ideas. Curiosity is a good sign, because it means their brain is wide open,” explains Dr. Hafeez.
- Jealous
Jealousy shows up when a friend gets something they wanted, or someone else gets the spotlight first. It might come out as being mean, but really, they just want to feel important too: “Talking it out helps them see they don’t want to take anything away, they just want that same good feeling for themselves.”
