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We’ve all been there: Your best friend in the whole entire world—your lovely, beautiful, kindhearted bestie—is dating a total bro or, worse, a mouth breather. His name’s Coby, but his friends call him Shark, and there’s just something about him you don’t like (yes, besides the fact that he goes by Shark). Do you think you’d have the guts to be honest with your friend about your feelings? Maybe not. But these four real women (who all preferred to remain anonymous) ventured where so few have gone before and actually lived to tell about it. Here are their confrontation stories. (Plus, one woman’s take from the other side of the coin.)

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girl drinking a beer alone
Twenty20

Maid of Dishonor

“The first time I met my BFF’s boyfriend, she invited him to crash our friend date. They’d been out about three times but had already made it official. Right off the bat I didn’t like him; I thought he had a super negative perspective on everything and was a total jerk. Before leaving, I pulled her outside the bar and told her, point blank, that he wasn’t my fave, and I thought she could do better. She thanked me…but continued dating him. To save face later, I made a joke out of it and pretended I’d been in a bratty bad mood that night. It’s been two years and we all joke about how hilarious it was that I hated him at first. And while I’ve definitely gotten to see the good sides of him, I still don’t really like him. (Oops.) Now she’s getting married, and I’m going to be her maid of honor.”

Mission: Impossible

"I'm part of a group of four very close girlfriends. Three of us loathe the fourth's boyfriend. We’ve tried to raise our concerns multiple times, but she just kept insisting we simply didn't know him well enough. Once they announced that they'd be moving in together, the rest of us decided that the boat had sailed on us being able to talk her out of the relationship and agreed to be as supportive as possible. We realized that this dude wasn’t worth losing our friendship over. TLDR: As long as she is happy, then I'll be there right by her side pretending to like him, too."

girl with headphones in
Twenty20

Sugar(Coat) Free

"A long-distance friend recently called me to vent about her new fling—a super-flighty ‘freelancer’ who would routinely show up to their dates upwards of an hour late and who once called her by the wrong name via text. I listened to her complain for approximately three minutes before I told her, ‘Girl, your boyfriend sucks, and you need to break it off now because he has absolutely zero redeeming qualities.’ I guess being so incredibly blunt worked because she ghosted him immediately.”

Drawing a Line at the Apartment Door

“My best bud dated this guy for a long while. I had concerns even before I met him; but when I finally did he proved me right, going on a long racist, misogynistic, xenophobic rant. (Shudders.) The next time she was coming to town, I let her know I didn't feel comfortable with him staying at my house. So they stayed somewhere else, and she and I worked through it, but it definitely shifted our relationship. We only fully repaired our friendship a year or so after they broke up. It is never a good situation to be in; but I’m glad I stood up for myself.”

friends having fun at the beach
Twenty20

The Tables Get Turnt

“My best friend would come around to parties and be rude to my new boyfriend the entire time. I tried to ignore it for a while—and he wasn't 100 percent innocent either—but it all came to a head one day when she said something like, ‘Well you wouldn't understand because you're not single...since you are with him.’ It put me in the position where I had to talk it out with her and explain that being in a relationship didn't take away from our friendship. So, to make the two of them get over it, I decided to double down and force us all, me, my BF and my BFF (plus our other best guy friend) share a room together in our vacation house. That sounds insane on my part, but it actually made them both realize the other wasn’t a terrible person.”

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