Women Can’t ‘Have It All,’ but They Can Do *This,* Says Randi Zuckerberg

Lean in, lean out: The dry-cleaning still needs to get picked up and your kid’s 4th grade class still needs a spirit day parent volunteer.

Investor and CEO Randi Zuckerberg has a novel solution…that’s actually really liberating. In her recent book Pick Three, the author of Dot Complicated makes the case the women should stop trying to do everything and pick three things each day to prioritize. So on one day, it might be sleep, kids and exercise. On another it might friendship, work and community engagement.

We recently caught up with Zuckerberg to ask her a few questions about how she sees the concept, and how she makes it work in her household.

PureWow: How did you come up with the idea for “pick three” to begin with?

Randi Zuckerberg: I’m on a lot of panels, but I’m often the only woman on the panel. Typically, the moderator goes down the line and asks the men interesting questions…and then asks me the same question boring question: “How do you balance work and kids?” Out of this frustration, I say, “Nobody balances it all.” In fact, when we think of the things we’re most proud of, those things never happen when we’re well balanced. They happen when we prioritize.

PW: So how do you decide which “three” to prioritize?

RZ: It depends on what I’m doing. On-the-road Randi prioritizes work, fitness and sleep. At-home Randi prioritizes family and catching up with friends.

PW: How do you handle guilt about the stuff you’re not doing?

RZ: I think it’s about mindset. Instead of striving for balance every day or every week, we should be thinking of our priorities as ever-changing. We go through phases and we need to give ourselves permission to be in those phases. I have two young children, and I really want to be a good friend, and I know that right now I just can’t. But I know this phase is temporary. We need to stop beating ourselves up over the things we can’t do immediately.