We’ve been law-abiding citizens ever since we tried to sneak that Snickers into our pocket at 7-Eleven when we were six years old (trust us, we learned our lesson). But there are heaps of silly and bizarre legislation in every state we never knew about--mostly because they aren’t even enforced. But still! Here, the weirdest laws to ever grace the 50 states. 

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Alabama
Bear wrestling is illegal. In case you were thinking about it…

Alaska
Sorry, Mom--avoiding cracks while walking on sidewalks is apparently against the law.

Arizona
Cutting down a certain type of cactus could land you with a 25-year prison sentence.

Arkansas
Flirting in Little Rock could mean 30 days in jail, lovebirds.

California
Here, sunshine is considered a legal human right. OK, we’re moving.

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Colorado
Catapults cannot be used to fire at buildings. This law isn’t just old; it’s medieval.

Connecticut
A pickle must bounce if it’s to be considered a pickle. Well…finally someone said what we were all thinking.

Delaware
No changing clothes in your car. (But can you still eat burritos there?)

Florida
It is illegal to sell your children. Oy, Florida…

Georgia
Sex toys are banned. That’s it. We’re canceling our Atlanta trip.

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Hawaii
No coins shall ever be put in ears. Looks like Hawaii is where your grandpa’s favorite magic trick goes to die.

Idaho
Riding a merry-go-round on Sunday is illegal. (Have you no soul, Idaho?!)

Illinois
It’s forbidden in Chicago to give your dog whiskey. We have a feeling Al Capone had something to do with this one.

Indiana
Hey kids, it’s not only not cool to sell your parents’ jewelry in Fort Wayne; it’s illegal.

Iowa
Don’t break the law: Refrain from kissing strangers.

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Kansas
Hold up--is that wine in a teacup? Strictly prohibited in Topeka.

Kentucky
You must bathe at least once a year (what’s that smell?).

Louisiana
Planning the ole pizza delivery prank? Hope you’re up for a $500 fine.

Maine
The Christmas spirit is alive in Maine! That is, unless you keep your decorations up past January 14.

Maryland
The MGM Lion is one thing, but you can’t take your pet lion into the movies in Baltimore.

RELATED: The Best Sandwich Shop in Every State (OK, and D.C.)

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Massachusetts
Candy can’t have more than one percent alcohol. Sorry, no rosé tootsie pops this summer.

Michigan
Get hurt while robbing a house? In Michigan it’s legal to sue the homeowners.

Minnesota
The government agrees with you: Mosquitoes are officially decreed a public nuisance.

Mississippi
Horses must not be housed within 50 feet of any road. OK, we can live with that.

Missouri
Single men between 21 and 50 must pay the state an annual $1 tax. It pays to date, people.

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Montana
In Billings, you can’t have a pet rat. Any way we can make this a Constitutional Amendment?

Nebraska
Hey, if you don’t have a state license, you’re breaking the law (and some fashion rules) if you try to give your daughter a perm.

Nevada
It’s since been repealed, but you should think twice before taking your camel on the highway.

New Hampshire
Mr. Seymour Buts, you better not use an alias to check in to a hotel in New Hampshire.

New Jersey
Stay in the car. You’re literally not allowed to pump your own gas.

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New Mexico
Nudity is allowed. Kinda. Your nipples and genitals have to be covered.

New York
No slippers after 10 p.m.

North Carolina
It’s illegal to sing off-key (but keep doing your thing in the shower).

North Dakota
Beer and pretzels cannot be served at the same time.

Ohio
It’s illegal to get a fish drunk within state lines--this is looking like a sad trend now…

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Oklahoma
We’d give you a bite of our hamburger, but it’s kinda against the law.

Oregon
Dirty talk isn’t just dirty; it’s illegal.

Pennsylvania
Tipsy? Then you might have a hard time finding a minister to marry you.

Rhode Island
You probably already knew this, but it’s illegal to bite off a person’s leg.

South Carolina
No work on Sundays. It’s the law.

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South Dakota
It’s forbidden to fall asleep in a cheese factory.

Tennessee
There’s a $500 fine for sharing Netflix passwords (oops, we’re in trouble).

Texas
It’s since been revoked--thank goodness--but for a while there, you’d pay a $10 fine for milking another person’s cow.

Utah
Restaurants may serve alcoholic beverages only with food. Noooooooo.

Vermont
FYI, it’s illegal to tie your giraffe to a telephone pole.

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Virginia
It’s illegal to tickle women.

Washington
If you see Bigfoot, it’s a felony punishment if you harass him.

West Virginia
Roadkill can be eaten for dinner. Yum.

Wisconsin
Restaurants are required to put cheese on apple pie--well, it was proposed as a law in 1935, but we fully support it.

Wyoming
Don’t get drunk in a mine, and not only because it could land you with a one-year prison sentence.

RELATED: The 50 Best Burgers in America, by State

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