At their best, brothers can be someone to bounce ideas off of or gang up—jokingly, of course—on your parents when they have questions about how to use “the damn Facebooks.” At their worst, they can be cesspools of negativity (just like any human being, honestly). If the latter situation sounds familiar (no pun intended), you might have a toxic brother.
Toxic patterns vary from person to person, but there are a few textbook characteristics to look out for, therapist Irina Firstein tells us. “Toxic behavior is behavior toward other people that makes them feel bad about their life and themselves,” she says. “It is characterized by criticism, control, manipulation and guilt.” From turning everything into a competition to refusing to take responsibility for their actions, find ten signs of a toxic brother below.