Slate Has 75% Less Sugar Than Regular Chocolate Milk (but You’d Never Know It from the Taste)

slate chocolate milk review cat

Value: 18/20
Functionality: 20/20
Quality: 19/20
Aesthetics: 20/20
Taste: 18/20

Total: 95/100

Whether it’s the sugar content or the tummy-churning lactose, there are a few reasons chocolate milk might not be on your shopping list. But there’s no doubt that this better-for-you alternative is tasty (and healthy) enough to change that. Meet Slate, the first line of all-natural, lactose-free chocolate milk.

The brand creates canned chocolate milk designed especially for adults. Not that kids can’t drink it; it’s just crafted with health, fitness and wellness in mind. You may recognize the sleek little cans from ABC’s Shark Tank. Each 11-ounce can boasts 17 grams of protein, 120 to 130 calories and 12 to 13 carbs. Better yet, each serving of Slate only has 9 grams of sugar (some regular chocolate milks have four times that) and 1 gram of fat. All three flavors are made with skim milk, cane sugar, cocoa and monk fruit, the latter of which is added for extra sweetness.

If you tend to stay away from chocolate milk because of the dairy rather than the sugar, you’re still in luck. After skimming the milk, Slate uses ultrafiltration to filter out its lactose (aka most of its natural sugars), which more than half of adults actually have trouble digesting. Slate sources its milk from 30 family-owned U.S. dairy farms and uses recyclable aluminum in its cans. So not only is the product better for you, it’s better for the earth, too.

The cans are tiny, small enough to stuff in your yoga bag or purse for on-the-go energy. That means they won’t take up a lot of space in your fridge either. But FYI, Slate says you don’t have to refrigerate the milk in the first place…though it tastes best cold, of course. The way the milk is pasteurized (similar to many canned cold brews and coffee drinks) means it’ll be delivered safely to your door sans-refrigeration.

You may be lucky enough to find Slate at your local Whole Foods, but if not, there’s always the online shop. Try a variety pack of all three flavors or buy a dozen of one. Read on to find out our favorite flavor.

slate chocolate milk review classic chocolate

1. Classic Chocolate Milk

Our inner child is so stoked because Slate's take on the classic beverage tastes pretty damn close to the chocolate milk of our youth. It’s silky-smooth like real milk, not thinned out or fake tasting. It’s sweet without being overwhelmingly so. The taste sort of reminds us of an iced hot chocolate, thanks to the real cocoa and the slight drying effect on the tongue that often comes with it. Your kids will love this one.

Taste: 18/20

slate chocolate milk review dark chocolate

2. Dark Chocolate Milk

OK, this one has to be our top pick. It’s got a rich, luxurious mouthfeel and robust chocolatey flavor. It also has a hint of dark chocolate’s signature bitterness, but even diehard milk chocolate fans can get behind the taste. The sweet and totally chuggable flavor kind of reminds us of double-chocolate gelato or Dove dark chocolates.

Taste: 20/20

slate chocolate milk review espresso chocolate

3. Espresso Chocolate Milk

Calling all mocha latte fans. This flavor starts with a Colombian coffee base that boasts 150 milligrams of caffeine per can, which is equal to about two shots of espresso. The coffee flavor is significant (we’d say it’s a 50/50 split between java and chocolate), but the sweetness balances the roasted, slightly bitter notes of the coffee. Have this one in the morning in place of your cup of joe—it’ll keep you just as energized and twice as satisfied, thanks to the protein.

Taste: 17/20

taryn pire

Food Editor

Taryn Pire is PureWow’s food editor and has been writing about all things delicious since 2016. She’s developed recipes, reviewed restaurants and investigated food trends at...