Your Weekly Horoscopes: January 26 to February 1, 2020
Hold on tight, because this week’s astrology is dazed and confused. Planet of love Venus and planet of action Mars clash both with each other (sexy!) and with nebulous Neptune (sexy...and complicated!) from the 26th through the 28th. It’s the cosmic equivalent of one of those sensory deprivation float tanks. Definitely therapeutic, but WTF just happened? Let’s do our best to stay grounded, so next week we can laugh it off.
(Horoscopes follow for each sign. If you know your rising sign, reading for that will provide further insight.)
You are finding deal after deal this week, Aquarius. That beautiful ceramic Dutch oven? Seventy percent off. That exquisite Eames office chair? Available at an estate sale for a steal. Don’t spend money you don’t have on all this stuff, but definitely collect the bounty while you can. On the 28th, you go thrifting with a friend and can’t find a single thing that fits. This is your hint from the universe to quit while you’re ahead and enjoy the bounty you’ve collected.
This week, you’re either on cloud nine or in a state of utter exhaustion. Either way, you are fully living in a dream. On the 27th especially––when the moon (your body), Venus (your mojo) and Neptune (our collective fantasy) come together in your sign—you’re seeing life in fully tinted rose-colored glasses, and things have never looked so good. By the 28th, a stressful situation at work forces you to come back down to earth. After that’s handled, take it easy for the rest of the week. It’s exhausting to face reality.
Hallelujah! This week brings that long-awaited family beach vacation, and you deserve every bit of escape and relaxation coming your way. On the 28th, though, be careful not to have too many martinis with your mother-in-law (who graciously came along to watch the kids)! If you let your guard down too far, you may be in for some unsolicited opinions, or worse, salacious family gossip you didn’t want to know. If you can, find your bliss in solitude by seeking out a balance of deliberate relaxation.
Ride this week’s intoxicating cosmic waves in the company of your BFFs, dear Taurus. On the 26th, a friend comes to you asking for a massive favor. Though you’re feeling extra generous right now, don’t agree to it unless you actually want to do it. She can always ask someone else. On the 27th, your charisma shines at your weekly Bachelor viewing party. Be sure to exchange numbers with the cool acquaintance who shares your sense of humor.
Things are going really well at work this week. Projects aren’t getting completed exactly, but morale has never been higher. On the 27th, your least favorite coworker brings in some out-of-this-world chicken salad sandwiches for the entire office, putting your boss is in an uncharacteristically jovial mood. Bottle up this feeling, because on the 28th an email from an irate client about a missed deadline totally kills the vibe. With a little luck, you can sweet-talk your way out of disaster.
This week’s influences have you feeling like you not only want to but actually can save the world. On the 27th, you have the crazy idea to apply to that dual-degree environmental science and MBA program...for the third time. Try to parse out whether you really want this or just like the idea of it. (Hint: It’s probably the latter.) On the 28th, you’re unpleasantly reminded that this quest comes with a whole lot of work. Abort the mission before you’re too deep in the trenches, and consider saving the world in a way that doesn’t involve a massive loan.
Money is flowing and opportunities are on the rise this week––not for you, but for your other half. Whether it’s your hubby, long-term girlfriend or big-time crush, they’ve received an offer they simply cannot refuse and they’re doing every type of dance to get you to pack up and move to Austin/Minsk/Mexico City so they can take a dream job and you can...come along for the ride. You’re thrilled for this person, but this isn’t your story. On the 28th—luckily for you—the offer disappears into thin air. Remind this person that decisions (especially international ones) need to be made together.
This week finds you deep in the honeymoon period of your relationship. Whether you started dating last month or you’ve been married for ten years, things are hot, heavy and too good to be true. On the 28th, a conflict with your family pulls you out of your bliss cocoon. Your mom doesn’t like that you’re skipping out on the big reunion next month to spend time with your honey instead. Remember that until you settle the rift, this imbalance will leave you feeling exhausted.
You have been struggling to find your flow so far in 2020, but this week things start clicking. Your daily routine is functioning like a well-oiled machine. You are doing face masks while you work on your taxes! You are going to Pilates during your lunch break! You are meal planning so you can save money and eat healthier. On the 27th, you reach the ultimate high, which is followed by a rude awakening on the 28th when your roommate or sister has a crisis and derails your whole day. At least you had a few days of joy.
Though it’s been years since you’ve had luck with the apps, you are back in biz and scheduling date after date at the beginning of this week (and feeling good about yourself in the process!). The fun starts to wear down a bit on the 28th when your date asks to split the check at a restaurant you absolutely cannot afford. Turns out he isn’t super wealthy, he just has great taste...and you ordered top-shelf cocktails like you’re Don Draper. Take this as a hint to slow your roll and become more and more deliberate with each week you’re on Tinder.
This hazy week has major homebody vibes for you, Sagittarius. On the 27th, that new sectional couch you ordered finally arrives and you spend the rest of the week cozied up with Netflix and takeout. Try not to beat yourself up for being lazy (especially on the 28th when it’s likely that anxiety is high) and enjoy the slower pace. It’s OK—we repeat, it’s OK—to sleep in! It’s OK to eat both egg rolls! It’s OK to miss a birthday party! It’s OK to take a break from the big adventure.
This week, you’re feeling like the queen of the neighborhood. Your brother is in town, and the two of you end up closing down your favorite local bar—just like old times!—on the 26th and the 27th. Strangely, though, on the 28th when you try to go back for one last round, and the place is shuttered without a note or any explanation. Nothing gold can stay. Pocket this experience as a metaphor for the future to help you remember that tomorrow isn’t promised.