An Honest Vibrator Review: ‘The Poet’ Knows That (Dirty) Talk Ain’t Cheap

• Value: 20/20
• Functionality: 20/20
• Quality: 20/20
• Aesthetics: 20/20
• Ease of Use: 19/20
• TOTAL: 99/100

Poetry. Kind of mysterious, am I right!? I mean I *get* poems but at the same time…I’m kind of secretly like like, wait, do I? The thing about poetry is that you can’t read it without thinking about the fact that you’re reading a poem the whole time. Like rare jazz music, just as you get into it, a little voice can emerge within that reminds you just how supremely intellectual and interesting you are. It’s like suddenly seeing yourself from a bird’s-eye-view smoking a cigarette with a beret and sunglasses on. While obviously very cool, it’s incredibly distracting.

As a writer, there’s nothing that excites me like a lover that has a way with words. Sweet notes, sweet talk and sweet nothings whispered into my ear during sex are all amazing ways to evoke romance and sensuality. To speak astrologically (literally why not?) my Venus, the planet of love, is in Gemini, the most verbose sign in the zodiac. So, to me, a good chat is an incredible aphrodisiac. If we’re on a date and your conversation can keep me interested and make me laugh, there is a good chance I’m picking up what you’re putting down, babe.

When I heard there was a new vibrator on the market called ‘The Poet,’ my interest was obviously piqued. Poems, like clitoral stimulators, are some of my favorite things in the world. Nearly always rhythmical, they both play with pacing and repetition in a way that can evoke a deep sense of pleasure. What I love about air-pulse toys that they’re designed with the uniqueness of the clit in mind, emitting pulses of air to stimulate the nerves in and around it. The indirect clitoral stimulation provided by the air pulsing is a really deep sensation that I haven’t experienced with standard vibrators. Because no two clitorises are sized the same, the mouth of the toy needs to be a good fit. Lots of water-based lube really helps, too.

The Poet has three interchangeable suction mouths that feel extremely different, so it’s fun to try them out and see what one fits your body best. For me, I liked the largest one, but they all felt pretty great. It comes equipped with five pulsation settings which are easily controlled by giving the device a squeeze. Each setting was suited to flow into the next, creating a pacing that was easy to just sit back and enjoy. When you find the best pulse mode for you, a single click keeps that pulse until you’re ready to move into the next. You can also hold the sides of the vibrator at any point to create a steady air flow that feels absolutely amazing.

I’ve used this vibrator a few times and each experience was different. That, to me, is something worth investing in. If you’re down to discover new sensitivities and pleasure preferences, this toy has the versatility to provide that experience. I also think this would be a great toy to use during penetrative sex with a partner because the texture is a velvety silicone which makes it so relaxing to use to the point where you almost forget it’s there. It’s waterproof as well and, with a good amount of lube, the variety of options provide the perfect setting to evoke a full body orgasm.

I will say it’s not the quietest vibrator I ever used, but why should it be!? It’s The Poet, after all. The package comes with a USB charger, beautiful satin pouch and a little booklet that explains how to use the toy, along with a fab little poem, of course.  Ultimately, I think The Poet is the perfect partner to get into a deep conversation with, if ya know what I mean.