Although both my husband, Mark, and I are Leos, we try our best not to let our fire sign emotions get the best of us (I meditate, he golfs). Even so, when we exchanged vows on our wedding day, we acknowledged the fact that fights inevitably happen. So, we incorporated a truce bell into our ceremony.
We got the idea from our wedding planner, Tessa Lyn, but it’s actually an Irish tradition that dates back centuries. Historically, in Irish families, brides and grooms are given a set of bells to ring after they exchange wedding vows. The functionality is twofold. The bells ward off evil spirits and also remind the couple of their vows long after the celebration is over.
The custom suggests these bells should be placed in a prominent place in the couple’s home. When an argument arises, the bells serve as a reminder of the happiness and promises made on their wedding day. The couple should then use them to signal the end of an argument, call a time out or even just clear the air. Basically, they’re like palo santo, but for relationships.
Both Mark and I are both a little bit Irish (at least that’s what 23andMe told us), but that’s not why we opted to include a bell in our ceremony. We saw it as a way to wipe away the expectation of perfection in our marriage. As well-suited as we think we are, it doesn’t mean we’ll agree on everything for the rest of our lives. (If that were the case, I’d be seriously concerned one of us was a Stepford Wives robot.)