You’ve spent hours on the couch cringe-watching as people cry in confession booths over scorned lovers, as families throw tantrums over redecorated homes they loathe and as hosts unfairly axe your favorite contestant before it was “their time.” But now it’s your turn to get off the couch and make things right. Here are 11 reality TV shows you can apply to be on as we speak.
1. The Bachelor or The Bachelorette
Let’s call it what it is: This is your chance to drunk-cry on national television.
2. MasterChef Junior
If only our eight-year-old could make us a five-course dinner.
3. “Extreme Home Makeover Show”
A little vague. Potentially an off-brand Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. But if there’s any hope of Ty Pennington, we’re in.
4. Little Big Shots
Production’s specifically looking for a “young parrot owner.” If that means anything to your savant, parrot-owning child, get in there.
5. Are You the One?
How could you ever put a price on love? With $1 million on the line, you just might.
6. Say Yes to the Dress
Want to sit every person you’ve ever met on a couch so they can tell you how you can’t quite pull off a strapless mermaid? This one’s for you.
7. Dream Cruise
If you had the opportunity to take your--you guessed it--dream cruise vacation, where would you go?
8. “A Female Security Guard Reality Show”
9. Worst Bakers in America
So you’re not a great baker. OK, so you’re actually terrible. But would you try to get better for $25,000? We thought so.
10. Married at First Sight: Second Chances
Say “I do” to someone who already said “I do” to someone they met for the first time at the altar. #sure
11. The Amazing Race
Because you’ve always wanted to fight with your fiancé in front of cameras before spelunking 600 feet down a mysterious cave.