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The 21st-century moms group: great for mutual support, rampant insecurity assurance and endless email chains about preschool ratings and poop consistency. Here, the 13 characters you probably can’t avoid.

mom1

The overachiever

She just made partner at her law firm, her six-month-old is crawling at a nine-month-old level and she totally purees her own Bartlett-quinoa-yam mash. (And ugh, it’s freaking delicious.)

mom9

The casual disaster

There's no place in her house that isn't encrusted with Cheerio dust (and she may or may not skip library story time to watch Real Housewives).

momhelicopter

The helicopter mom

"Tyler, is that a truck? Tyler, are you picking up the truck? Tyler, do NOT put that truck in your mouth!"

mom

The free-range parent

"Hmmm, has anybody seen Tyler?"

momfreerange

The hippie

Did you know disposable diapers are, like, really bad for baby seals?

mom10

The yuppie

Uppababy Vista and Stokke high chair not included.

mombreastfeed

The overly enthusiastic breast-feeder

Her kid is six--and can now coherently explain which side he likes better.

mom8

The expert in early childhood development

Never leaves home without a set of flash cards. Is a little worried your child isn’t showing more signs of “stranger-eye-contact lip-reading maturity.”

momforeign

The foreigner

In Latvia, it's totally normal for babies to sleep outside and also drink vodka.

youngmom

The young mom

Damn her endless enthusiasm and rock-hard abs.

mom5

The old mom

The miracles of modern medicine!

mom6

The nanny

Who is secretly a more competent human than any of us will ever be.

mom3

The DILF

Hot.

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