31 Things Only a Cat Person Understands

They may seem cute and cuddly—and, sure, they have their moments—but at their core, cats are less like pets and more like roommates…roommates with litter boxes we have to clean. They’re basically Bengal tigers with their own agendas. And honestly? We respect that, mostly because we have no other choice. If you’re a cat person, you get it. Here, 31 other things only cat people really understand.

6 Reasons It’s Actually Better to Let Your Cat Sleep in Your Bed

person holding a cat

1. Hell hath no fury like a cat who's being gently and lovingly picked up.

2. Cats can teleport—just leave an empty box/bag/container out, and your cat will suddenly appear inside of it.

3. Grating scalp scratch? That means it’s time for breakfast.

cat with lint roller

4. Cats invented—and purrfected—resting bitch face.

5. They’ve also nailed down hard-core tuna breath. ('s what your cat's meowing really means.)

6. If you don’t watch your step, your foot will end up in a sweet little pile of vomit.

7. ...or wet hairballs.

8. ...or litter pellets.

9. ...or on a tail (for which you will never be forgiven).

cat in litterbox

10. That somehow they manage to stand entirely inside the litter box, and still pee just outside of it, probably to deliberately mess with your head.

11. No, that’s not a herd of wildebeests; it’s my eight-pound tabby running down the hall.

12. And yet it’s shockingly easy to lose a cat...inside a studio apartment.

cat under blanket

13. ...or living room.

14. ....or closet.

15. ...or honestly anywhere with a small, dark corner.

16. Your Instagram feed is 10 percent food, 10 percent friends and family and 80 percent cats. OK fine, make that 5 percent other people and 85 percent cats. 

17. If it’s not a fly in your house, your cat has seen a ghost.

cat with book

18. Put your glasses on your nightstand and your cat will sit and stare at them for 20 minutes.

19. And then casually nudge them onto the floor.

20. Along with anything else sitting up there, including but not limited to: pens, ChapStick, mail, plants, spoons and picture frames.

21. 11 p.m. is the perfect time to go absolutely apeshit.

22. So is 5 a.m.

cat with laptop

23. But, as soon as you open your computer, it’s time for a nap. On. The. Keyboard.

24. Which means that working from home days are impossible. 

25. Your brand-new Crate & Barrel sofa is interchangeable with a scratching post.

26. As is your shin, especially when you’re wearing your most expensive J. Crew work pants.

cat on couch

27. According to your calculations (and laws of physics), there’s absolutely no way your cat can jump from said nightstand into the top shelf of the closet—until they defy gravity and do it.

28. Which is why you’ve learned to eyeball the highest corners of your their home as soon you as you enter.

cat in makeup bag

29. Because they’re probably inside the zipped suitcase tucked away in the hardest-to-get-to point of your home.

30. The truth is, we measly humans must accept that the only real control we have over them is when we have a laser pointer in hand.

31. But it’s all worth it for those precious three seconds when they decide to lie on your chest and purr.

SAshley Headshot PureWow

Freelance Writer

Sarah Ashley is a Chicago-based freelance journalist. She has covered pets for PureWow for six years and tackles everything from dog training tips to the best litter boxes. Her...