You know that one co-worker who’s never satisfied despite the free snacks and unlimited cold brew? Every office has one, and Karamo Brown wants to give us the skills to deal with them effectively.
Brown explained that in order to set yourself up for success, it helps to have a mediator. If that’s not a possibility, then it’s on you to make the first move. “You need to find a way to talk to them. I’m a big believer that if you listen better, you live better,” the Fab Five culture expert explained.
He went on to share the golden rule of healthy confrontation, saying, “Make sure you only come from ‘I’ statements. Come from a place of, ‘This is how I feel’…Because when you do the I statements, it allows you to say, ‘This is what I’m asking for my well being, for my mental health. Can you help me in getting there?’”
So does this simple solution really work? In Brown’s experience, yes—unless “someone’s just really a bad person.” And if addressing conflict really isn’t your thing (*raises hand*) Brown offered a different perspective on asking a co-worker, or anyone for that matter, to chill out on the negative vibes: “They’re going to respect the fact that you’re asking for their help in making sure that your self-care is better.”
Looks like it’s time to start practicing that speech to Kelly in accounting. Gulp.