6 Signs You and Your Boyfriend Aren’t Actually Ready to Live Together
Your lease is almost up. What better time/reason for you and your boyfriend to take the plunge and move in? But before you blend your books and closets, take a minute to review these six indicators—they might be telling you to hold off.
You Still Haven’t Had a Blowout Fight
Guys, no matter how lovey dovey you and your boyfriend feel, it’s inevitable: You’re gonna fight. But what’s most important to figure out is how you fight. Because if you’re a shouter and he prefers the silent treatment, it’s better to know each other’s tactics—and how you’ll work together to reach a compromise—before you feel stuck in a lease.
You’re Not Comfortable Around Him Unless You Have Makeup On
Raccoon eyes—you know, when you rub your mascara-covered eyes before bed—are a thing. And if the worst thing in the world would be for your boyfriend to see you like this, moving in is still probably a no-no.
You Haven’t Defined Your Deal Breakers
He’ll never get a dog. And you can’t go to bed unless the entire apartment is clean. What matters is that you’re clear (and honest) about these things before you move in.
...And You’re Kind of Unsure About How You’ll Handle the Bills
“The rent will get paid…by someone?” is not something you should be saying in your head. It’s less about combining finances and more about having a strategy for who will handle what. Maybe you set up a joint account that covers all shared apartment expenses. Or maybe, every month you Venmo your half of the rent. Whatever your plan, what matters is that you have the conversation so you’re on the same page from day one.
You’ve Never Traveled Together
Real talk: Vacation—whether it’s a flight to see your parents or across the pond to Paris—is the biggest eye-opener about a person’s lifestyle, hands-down. So if you went away for a long weekend and were irked by his every move, the fact that your lease is almost up doesn’t matter: Hold off.
You Haven’t Discussed Your Expectations
This one is kind of a biggie. Maybe your end game is marriage. Maybe not. What matters is that you lay it all out on the table, not as an ultimatum, but as a “just so you know, this is my five-year plan-ish.”