“I didn’t know this pandemic would bring out a new side to my relationship, but it absolutely has. My boyfriend and I keep getting into daily, stupid fights—what to eat for lunch, whose turn it is to do laundry, etc. We have never spent this much time together without outside influences. Is this a sign we are not meant to be, or will we rebound after this awfully long phase of togetherness?”
It’s really important to remember that nothing about this pandemic is normal. The toll on our healthcare system is not normal. The impact on the global economy is not normal. The fear of entering a grocery store is not normal. The sheer amount of time we’re spending indoors is not normal, and the stress on our relationships and mental health is not normal.
What is normal? The fact that you are having friction with your boyfriend right now. During an incredibly stressful time in the world, you only have him to lean on with any consistency. And if he’s not responding to your fears as you’d like, it can trigger a lot of sadness and misunderstood feelings. So, it’s natural that you’re feeling doubt about the relationship.
Here’s the thing: We’re not really meant to be with one person, day in and day out, seven days straight, six weeks in a row (and counting). Humans are social creatures. We need families, friends, colleagues, mentors. We need a change of scenery. We need to cool off from fights with our partners, only to return a couple hours later and realize it wasn’t that big of a deal. Right now, we can’t have that.