In a perfect world, your future husband would save you from getting hit by a UPS truck as you struggle to free your Gucci slingback from a sewer grate. You’d tumble into each other’s arms and then he, a surgeon (back from a Doctors Without Borders trip, naturally), would gaze into your eyes and fall deeply in love. But you’re not J.Lo, and Matthew McConaughey is married—sorry, ladies. Instead of the rom-com of our dreams, this is real life, where finding a partner out in the wild is as rare as finding those Gucci slingbacks on sale. Instead, so many people are connecting via dating apps that they’re actually the number one way couples meet, according to a Stanford University study.
While this gives us hope, we know that navigating the World Wide Web of dating sites can be overwhelming and frustrating, to say the least. That’s why we reached out to Logan Ury, Hinge’s Director of Relationship Science, plus 11 women from all over the country who were able to do it successfully, for their best online dating tips. Their wisdom, below.