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So you’re married to a Libra, huh? As the sign of relationships themselves, Libras have a reputation for being connoisseurs of partnerships. However, that doesn’t mean their spouses get to coast on an easy setting throughout their lives together (especially if they aren’t Libras either). Below, I’ve outlined some of the most common bumps you’re likely to hit on the road to true love with a Libra—and ways to hold on.

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man tying his shoes
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If your partner is indecisive...

Libra indecision is so real. As the sign of justice, Libras are naturally disposed to weighing all sides (in every dimension) of any issue. While matters of national jurisprudence certainly warrant an extensive review of the facts of the case, your partner probably need not apply the same intensity to the question of whether to wear maroon or plum pants to your co-worker’s cocktail party.

It’s not just the love of sweet justice that motivates your Libra; it’s the allure of making the “best” decision. The way around this is to appeal to their natural sense of equality (an extension of their love of justice), and show them that when the burden of choice falls to you, that’s an uneven distribution of emotional labor. Your Libra may not realize that their lackadaisical hunt for a perfect solution (again, sometimes we’re talking about what pants to wear...) is a luxury afforded by you throwing up your hands and saying, “Just wear the plum pants!” If you frame this as a power imbalance, they’ll be more likely to pick up the slack.

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If you detect a chilly undercurrent...

While Libras are friendly and usually quite popular, they can be a little cold and aloof. Seems contradictory, no? But it’s because Libras are cerebral, preferring to bond with their 1,000 BFFs over intellectual matters—like whether or not ghosting is rude in a hypothetical culture wherein everyone shares an aversion to goodbyes—than forge deep, emotional connections. Furthermore, their rich social life means that their natural state is to be spread a little thin. That’s just the Libra way.

Obviously, if you’re married to a Libra, your relationship is deep and committed. But the way to nurture that warmth is to appeal to their sense of romance. Woo them, plain and simple. Propose the kind of date that urges conversation (no movies, live shows or loud bars), and really take each other in. There’s nothing like one-on-one quality time to stir up those butterflies and bring out the tender side of your Libra.

man on his phone
Twenty20

If your partner is a people pleaser (and it’s driving you up the wall)...

It can be exhausting when you’re hanging out with someone who wants everyone to like them—and Libras do want everyone to like them, even if they say they don’t. You might even sense a hint of duplicity, like when you overhear them going off about how much they loved Paddington 2 when you know they secretly thought it was just OK. They tend not to lie outright, but fitting in is a priority, even if they are already loved.

You know your partner inside and out, and you love them for who they are. While you are not responsible for their self-esteem (a point I would like to underscore!), you can show them in small ways that they don’t need the approval of everyone around them to feel worthwhile. Encourage them when they stand up for something they believe in, even if it’s unpopular, or when they take the lead on picking a restaurant in an indecisive group. They already know you’re on their side; they just need to feel it, too.

Kiki O'Keeffe is an astrology writer in Brooklyn. You can sign up for her newsletter, I don't believe in astrology, or follow her Twitter @alexkiki.

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