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Dear cheese, how do we love thee? Let us count the ways: In logs or wheels, in triangles or squares, our dairy desires know no bounds.

But, as we know, not all cheese is created equal, and should never be treated as such...which is why the slicing techniques for various shapes of milk curds differ as well.

“France is very proud of their cheeses,” Charles Duque, managing director of the French Dairy Board, which increases the awareness of European cheeses and butters in the U.S., told us. “They take such great pride presenting them and are respectful when it comes to the perfect cut.” So, basically, we’re saying each cheese has a certain je ne sais quoi. (Yep, we’re basically pros.)

Here, Duque’s tips for how to slice every shape of cheese.

1. Pyramid (Goat Cheese): Start from the center and cut downward. Slice the cheese in triangles like you would a pie.

2. Slice (Gouda): You’ll probably start with more of a square-ish slice. Cut these cheeses parallel to the largest part of the rind, then perpendicular to it once you get about two inches away from the end. The goal is to have a bit of rind on all of the pieces.

3. Log (Goat Cheese): Since this cheese often comes with an herbed or spiced exterior, slice the cheese into round slices by sliding your knife or unflavored dental floss through vertically so the outer portion remains around the outside of the entire slice.

4. Slice (Blue Cheese): The cheeses should be laid flat. Slice a wedge from the center of a thin edge to equally spaced points along the thick edge.

5. Slice (Brie): If the slice is very long, cut the end piece off first (though this part holds the most flavor, so you can leave on if you want...or just take it for yourself). Then cut another diagonal slice perpendicular to the end of the rind, so each slice will have a bit of rind on it.

 Bonjour, hostess with the mostess. Oui love your fromages. (OK, OK, we’re done now...)

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