Two truths: It’s not summer, and we don’t have a dog.
No harm in wishful thinking though, right? What better way to do so than to ogle this truly massive and ridiculous Dachshund-shaped pool float from Kool Pool. (Yes, pool floats are back already.)
To get a feel for the size of this thing, know that Amazon labels it as both a pool float and a mattress. The online description says he (or she) is almost seven feet long from head to tail, will hold up to 300 pounds and is a “strong pupper” (direct quote). The float also “doesn’t need to be fed or walked.” Good to know. There’s also a cup holder, which we bet your own Dachshund doesn’t have.
If you do plan on getting a head start for warmer months or investing in a dog-shaped mattress, 50 percent of the proceeds will be donated to the Humane Society, which we are very much about.