Whether or not you like your job, there are certain things about working in an office that are universally unpleasant. Chief among these common gripes are potentially sexist air-conditioning, a frustrating lack of refrigerator space and utterly unnecessary business jargon. While we can’t do much about the temperature or salad space, here are 11 terms to retire from your vocabulary immediately. (We’ll circle back next week to follow up.)
“I don’t really have the bandwidth right now.”
Just say you’re too busy.
“Hi! Wanted to circle back on my email from yesterday.”
Unless you’re running around a track, you’re probably not “circling.” Also, your email didn’t slip through the cracks; I just chose to ignore it.
“I’ve got a 3:30 hard stop.”
Stopping a meeting is easy. Let’s not make it hard.
“Heads up that I’ll be out of pocket all next week.”
Just say you’re going on vacation. We’re all going to be jealous anyway.
“To piggyback off of what Jessica said…”
Whenever you say this, we instantly imagine you hopping on Jessica’s back and riding her like a pony. Don’t make us picture that.
“To Mike’s point, I’m not blown away by the candidate’s experience.”
Moral of the story: Don’t start a sentence with “to.”
“We need to ideate on the marketing campaign a bit more.”
"Ideate" sounds like an ADD medication. Just say “brainstorm.”
“You know, I’m not sure it’ll work. It’s a pretty big ask.”
"Ask" is a verb, guys.
“I feel like the closing should be a little more robust.”
Please stop, unless you’re inviting us to happy hour at a wine bar. (In which case, we accept.)
“At this point we should probably put this on the back burner.”
Have you no respect for fire safety?
“Let’s chat about this offline.”
First, let’s just say “in person.” Second, let’s just not.