The Ultimate Fall To-Do List

Activities for people who really hate fall but pretend to love fall, but oh whatever let's all drink cider

Ahh, fall. The leaves are changing, the temps are dropping and the #PSL is back, baby. We don't want you to miss out on any autumnal fun, dear reader, so we compiled this handy list of every single thing you absolutely must do this season.

1. Go apple picking

2. Get frustrated when you can’t find any pretty apples

3. Decide to plant your own apple tree

4. Change your mind about the tree thing

5. Rake leaves

6. Jump in a pile of leaves

7. Re-rake the leaves


8. Drink a pumpkin-spice latte

9. Wear a cable-knit sweater

10. Wear boots

11. Wear flannel

12. Wear an infinity scarf

13. Complain about how cold it is

14. Talk about how fall is your favorite season

15. Pretend to care about football to bond with that cute guy in the office

16. Find out he has a girlfriend; regret buying a jersey

fall pumpkin carving

17. Carve a pumpkin

18. Enter a pumpkin-carving contest

19. Smash your competitors’ pumpkins when it’s announced that you didn’t win

20. Artfully assemble gourds in a wicker basket

21. Wonder why gourds are so creepy looking

corn maze

22. Go to a corn maze

23. Get lost in a corn maze

24. Have a panic attack in a corn maze when it’s been 25 minutes and you really feel like you’ve been walking in circles and what if you die here and oh god why did I think this was a good idea I really hate fall.

apple pie

25. Bake a pie

26. Instagram a photo of your pie with the hashtag #luvfall

27. Eat the entire pie yourself and immediately feel bad about it

28. Burn your tongue on hot apple cider

candy corn

29. Buy candy for trick-or-treaters

30. Decide that kids these days are brats and keep the candy for yourself, instead giving out the apples that you picked and have deemed too ugly for your own consumption

31. Make candy apples with the pretty apples

32. Schedule a dentist appointment

33. Get into a heated argument with a random passerby about canned versus homemade cranberry sauce

fall knitting

34. Decide to take up knitting

35. Decide knitting’s not for you

36. Think of a *really* clever group Halloween costume

37. Get *really* mad at the other group of girls at the party you’re at are wearing the exact same costume, but a little better executed.

38. Say you’re going to start Christmas shopping but then forget

spilled latte

39. Complain some more about how cold it is

40. Be totally over fall