15 Things to Know If You’re Doing Whole30
We’ve already told you about what happens to your body during the Whole30 program. You know, weight loss, improved sleep, clear skin. But what will you really be going through in those 30 days? If you’re anything like us, your internal dialogue while Whole30-ing will probably sound a little something like this.
1. Your friends will laugh at you when you bring your own plain chicken breast in Tupperware to a restaurant. That meal prep life is tough, man.
2. Or you might just be kind of a loner for a month. Because who wants to eat plain chicken when it’s sitting next to loaded cheese fries and margaritas?
3. Speaking of Tupperware…you will begin to think it might be the devil. Seriously, how is it so hard to find matching sets?
4. And speaking of your friends, you’ll tell them Whole30 is a lifestyle, not a diet. But deep down you know damn well that it sure feels like a diet.
5. You’ll miss the taste of cheese like you’ve never missed anything in your life. But don’t worry, the cravings don’t last the whole time.
6. And wine. Because a quiet, relaxing dinner just doesn’t taste the same with a nice glass of Cabernet.
7. The temptation to cheat will rear its ugly head at least once a day. Usually in the form of cupcakes celebrating a coworker’s birthday or your kid’s leftover ice cream or an ad on TV where Oprah won’t stop talking about how much she loves bread. We get it, Oprah. We get it.
8. Every time you come close to cheating but don’t cheat, you’ll feel like a minor (OK, major) deity. We promise, holding out is so worth it. And actually cheating makes you feel really bad.
9. You’ll be super proud of yourself for making a week’s worth of chicken and veggie soup. And be kicking yourself after four meals of chicken and veggie soup, after which you never want to see a bowl of chicken and veggie soup again. (Spoiler alert: It’s your next two lunches.)
10. Days one through three are a breeze, and you feel like you’re on top of the world. Then come days four and five. Ohhh, days four and five.
11. But after, like, day six, you’ll feel on top of the world again. Whole30? I bet I could do Whole60! (You cannot.)
12. You’ll whisper “I miss you” as you walk by bakeries, ice-cream shops, fast-food restaurants, etc. They miss you too, buddy. But this is worth it.
13. You’ll find yourself getting really excited about healthy, Whole30-approved treats. You’ve never thought of a cashew as a gift from the heavens, but here we are.
14. Once the 30 days are up, you’ll feel like a total rock star. And you should. That’s awesome.
15. Then you’ll try to convince your friends to do it with you next time. And they’ll be like “nahhh,” and then you’ll all laugh and go for pizza and wine.