16 Signs You’re Turning into a Foodie
We’re waiting for you to snap a pic of your plate so we can eat
Your ever-more-sophisticated appreciation for fine food is commendable. But if you recognize yourself in this list, you might want to spend a week sautéing fish in a Teflon pan with Pam and remembering that into everyone’s life, a little non-fresh-and-local must fall. Here, 16 signs you’ve become a foodie.
1. You use an app specifically for taking food photographs.
2. You refer to the Los Angeles Times' food critic as “Jonathan.”
3. Poutine is the new avocado toast. Discuss.
4. Kale? Ha. We’ve moved onto stinging nettles.
5. Poke--and how it’s sold everywhere now including supermarkets--makes you angry.
6. Strolling the farmers’ market is for tourists. You arrive at Santa Monica’s chef’s-favorite Wednesday farmers’ market when the farmers are still unloading.
7. You’ll pay $25 for a cocktail that uses a bong to suffuse flavor into mixing water, but you’ll walk a half mile so as not to waste $11 on that rip-off valet.
8. You don’t just follow food trucks on Twitter; you follow them around town.
9. You park at a lauded strip mall brasserie for lunch and exclaim, “Let’s see what Ludo Lefebvre is up to today.”
10. You drive all the way to Watts for a burger because “Roy Choi is doing great things for the community.”
11. You’ve been known to drive across town for the right doughnut.
12. You say “large format” instead of family-style.
13. You don’t dream of quitting your day job and opening a restaurant. You dream of quitting your day job and opening a farm-to-table, foraging-sourced fast-food evolution that’s based on lacto-fermented flavors.
14. You feel like if you have to look at one more naked cake on your Instagram, you’re going to troll. Hard. Because the anti-frosting trend has just gone too far.
15. You trace your political awakening to the time you read Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser and watched Food, Inc.
16. Who cares about the identity of “Becky with the good hair?” You want to know what kind of hot sauce Beyoncé keeps in her bag. Swag.