Maybe you're having a bad day. Maybe you're just fishing for a compliment. (Guilty.) Self-reflection can be healthy—but is your lousy self-esteem actually doing harm to your marriage?
Think about it from your spouse's perspective: Being someone's full-time cheerleader sounds pretty exhausting—even if you love them to death. Sure, your husband might be your support system, but that doesn't mean he wants to constantly tell you those stripes don't make you look like a beluga whale.
And according to psychologist Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD, self-acceptance allows for more intimate, fulfilling relationships because you're able to focus on others (and not just yourself). How to break the cycle? Try taking a page out of your doting husband's book: Show yourself some love by telling him one thing you're proud of each day.
And stop fishing for compliments, dammit! (That's what Instagram is for.)
