When you’ve been burned by someone you love, it’s hard to know where to begin. You’re torn between tending to your own wounds, surveying the full scope of the damage and rebuilding your relationship when the foundation looks like...rubble. Plus, no matter the size or specifics of the scandal, you weren’t the only one taken down by it—that person you love lost a lot of credibility and you might both be wishing you could go back to a time when your trust was intact.
Cheating, lying, financial infidelity—whatever the circumstances, there’s no denying that it sucks. And suddenly you’re left wondering what, if anything, can be salvaged.
The good news is that it is possible to rebuild trust in a relationship and if you can pull it off, there’s a sizable reward for your resilience on the other end. So how might it work for you? Is it wise? When it comes to negotiating the nuances of broken trust, you’re going to want some impartial, professional advice. (Thanks but no thanks, Aunt Sadie.) We checked in with two esteemed experts, Lauren Cook, marriage counselor and author of Name Your Story: How to Talk Openly About Mental Health and family therapist Dr. Kathryn Smerling, Ph.D. Here, their top tips for assessing the wreckage, rebuilding trust and knowing when it’s time to call it quits.