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Ketchup on your hot dog is never acceptable. And lake effect is your excuse for everything. These are just a couple of the irrefutable laws of the universe that only Chicagoans seem to grasp. Read on to get the full list.

RELATED: 22 Things to Eat in Chicago Before You Die

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Pizza should come with a metric ton of cheese

Your thin-crust Margherita is cute, but we’ve got a Chicago winter to get through. Bring on the cheese.

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Lake Effect is real and it haunts us all

We don’t really understand how it works, all we know is we live with it. Every. Single. Day.

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Getting screamed at can be a good thing

We like our encased meats with a side of good old-fashioned ridicule. Just hold the ketchup, whatever you do.

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A bad trip on LSD has nothing to do with drugs

We’ve all made the mistake of taking LSD only to get stuck in a jam of mind-blowing proportions.

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You should smell chocolate everywhere you go

Working within a two-mile vicinity of River North means you’re constantly struck with a craving for chocolate. Tough life, but things could be worse.

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twenty20

It snows in May, deal with it

Yep, we were once innocents, too, foolishly hoping for a warm, pleasant spring. Now we’re all hardened Chicagoans, keeping our mittens on standby through Memorial Day.

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A single cheeseburger is actually a double

The Au Cheval single cheeseburger is a life-changing experience, no matter how many patties actually end up on the thing.

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Layering is essential 85 percent of the year

We don’t mess around when it comes to disaster preparedness. Pack not one but two light sweaters and a jacket just in case things take a turn for the worse.

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Then it gets really, really hot

Yep, we skip right over spring in Chicago, transitioning from freezing cold to scorching hot. For two months of the year, we ditch the layers for the portable fan.

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MLB

We may be cursed, but we’re always optimistic

Especially this year.

RELATED: Quiz: Which Chicago Neighborhood Should You Really Live In?

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