6 Things That Might Not Happen on Your Wedding Day
And that’s OK
You’ve been counting down to this moment since, oh, the day you turned six. And now it’s here and you’re getting married and you look like a princess and dear God everything must go perfectly or you will cut a bitch. Slow your roll. Here, six things that might not happen… Make your peace with it.
You might not feel crazy connected to your spouse
Sure you might see him up at the altar and go all schmoopy and googly-eyed. Or you might be thinking about your hair. Or your weird military-grade corset. Or the fact that Aunt Rita is sporting way too much cleavage. Don't take it as a sign. You’re getting married because you love the guy, and you have the rest of your lives to fall in and out of hyper-connectivity.
You might not love your photographer
You hired her for her calming presence and ability to make a jar of peonies look like a Renoir. But day of--when she's barking orders at your grandma and demanding that you "frolic lovingly in that wheat field"--you may worry you've made a huge mistake. Don't. It's all part of her job and you'll thank her when the gorgeous photos come back.
You might not go to the bathroom
In our highly scientific office poll, only one out of six brides can actually remember urinating during the big day. (What can we say? Your body is a wonderland.)
You might not eat any cake
Oh, how you agonized over that buttercream banana frosting. But the truth is, you’re gonna be busy. And when you're forced to choose between dancing to Beyoncé and eating dessert, choose the Beyoncé. (Don't fret--the venue will wrap up the leftovers and send it home with you, anyway.)
You might not have sex
If, at 3 a.m. and after four tequila sunrises, you and the honey are ready to go...well, more power to you! But if not, don't beat yourselves up. You've had a LONG day. Plus, it’s totally fine to show up late to the morning-after brunch.
You might not get to micromanage every little detail
The napkins are the wrong shade of ecru. The maid of honor accidentally knocks over a cheese tray. Your cousin Mark (Table 7) decides to drag his chair over to cousin Hillary (Table 12). Sh*t is gonna happen. Ignore it. Roll with it. As long as the wine is flowing and Aunt Rita is doing the "Cha Cha slide," it's alllll good.