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Sure, when you were 26, it was A-OK not to know your financial status and to drunkenly call your ex from the back of a cab. But after 30, those things get a little bit awkward. (Um, drunk dialing your now-married ex who has two kids? Not so much.) So listen up, sophisticated 30-plus-year-olds: Here are 30 things you need to stop doing right now.


1. Binge drinking. (Come on, you know you get tipsy after two glasses of Sauv Blanc.)

2. Drunk texting old boyfriends. Or anyone.

3. Posting inebriated pics on Facebook. (Duh, use Snapchat.)


4. Falling asleep without removing your makeup.

5. Or brushing your teeth. 

6. Not knowing the status of your 401(k).

7. Or your credit score. 

8. Or your bank-account balance. (Which, dear God, better be more than $37.)


9. Buying a bathing suit you don’t feel 100 percent confident in.

10. Buying anything you don’t feel 100 percent confident in.

11. Skimping on sleep. (No, six hours isn’t enough.)


12. Holding on to toxic friends.

13. Posting social media updates every time you see your real friends. (Yes, it happened even if you don’t post about it.)


14. Skipping breakfast.

15. Or lunch.

16. Or forgetting to pad your stomach with dinner before having drinks. (See #1.)

17. Not knowing how to do your laundry.


18. Or wash your bra. (It’s all about the salad spinner.)

19. Or how often to wash your sheets.

20. Failing to keep up with the news and current events.


21. Failing to schedule regular checkups with your doctor.

22. Or gyno.

23. Or dentist.

24. Forgetting to apply sunscreen.


25. Or a moisturizer that’s preloaded with SPF.

26. Saying yes to everything.

27. Apologizing when you didn’t do anything wrong.


28. Refusing to apologize when you did do something wrong.

29. Neglecting your savings. (FYI, Paris 2016 won’t happen without a solid nest egg.) 

30. Sweating the small stuff. (And as long as it doesn’t involve your savings account or drunk dialing, it’s pretty much all small stuff.)


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